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How to tell your children you are getting married

When to tell your children that you plan to marry (or re-marry) can be a tough decision. Should you tell them alone? Should you tell them with your fiance? Or break the news with their father?

Much of this decision will depend upon the anticipated reaction of your children. If you child is a three-year-old who is quite used to your fiance being around, chances are it will be a very minor blib that falls somewhere between playing with their toys and bath time. But if your child still envisions that mom and dad will get back together, telling your child can be a little more difficult, and emotions will likely run rampant.

The reaction will also depend on the relationship your fiance has with your children. If your fiance has been a permanent fixture in your children's life for sometime, the reaction will be much different than if they only met your fiance a month ago.

Ages of the children involved play a large part. Up until about age 4 or 5, the event of your marriage will not have as big of an impact as it will to older children or teenagers.

Another thing to consider is the fact that children from a previous relationship are at the root of the breakdown of subsequent marriages. If this could possibly become an issue in your relationship, particularly if the children are hostile to the marriage, consider counselling to deal with these issues before they become a problem

 



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